I hummed a lullaby as I tucked my son in for bed. Even though he was eight years old, I couldn’t help but treat him as if he were still my pretty, little newborn baby. Verandi was downstairs in the kitchen making some hot tea.
Verandi was not her real name, her real name was Stephanie. I gave her the nickname, which means "beingness" in Icelandic.
I left Iceland for America approximately five years ago to start a new life, and I met Verandi at the factory where I found work. Verandi was born in Texas. She didn’t embody the typical, "cowgirl" stereotype, but everything about her was definitely western. Her voice and accent were country, her hair was bright and golden, very long, straight, and luxurious. Her locks cascaded all the way down to her hip. She usually has it tied in a bun or put in a ponytail, which showed off her sweet and inviting face. When she did let her hair down, it made me think of Rapunzel. Her eyes were bright blue, clear as water, as warm as sunshine. Her clothing was usually casual, like a pair of jeans, a blouse, a tank top, or a sweater during the cold months. She sometimes wore a cowboy hat and her shoes were the same rough and rugged cowboy boots that she had worn for over fifteen years.
I fell in love with her simplicity and her body. For a woman getting close to her thirties, she looked youthful. Her breasts were large, bouncy, and round. Her hips were nice and wide; it made me wonder why she never had children, they were perfect for bearing babies. Her ass was plump and round, too and she had a tiny waist. She was an independent working woman, with toned arms and legs, and her skin was pale and supple. She was a fair maiden in my eyes, but she always seemed so insecure and unsure of herself, always covering her body from head to toe even in the comfort of her own home.
Verandi’s husband had died in a horse accident, after which she neither got back into a saddle, nor admired or acknowledged her body in any way.
Verandi and I became good friends at the factory. My suffering eyesight made the job a danger to me, and she always looked out for my safety and well-being. She became my confidant, listening to me go on and on about my son Jonah. She made me feel special and loved as a friend. It was something I desperately craved.
After a couple of years of friendship, Verandi invited my son and I to move in with her in her little country home. She owned acres and acres of land where she raised a farm with three horses, some chickens, roosters, goats, ducks, and pigs. Living with her was like a dream come true, and my son adored her.
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Verandi owned every Elvis movie that was ever made. She often told me that she and her husband loved Elvis and watched his movies every weekend. When Jonah went to a friend’s for the night, we would pop one of those movies in and watch it. She never cried; she only snuggled me into her arms with a smile on her face. At times, I kissed her softly, and she never seemed to mind. She would only blush. Our contact never went beyond
Often I would braid her hair after she bathed. After she washed it, it smelled like coconuts. I folded each strand over on itself so that it wouldn’t get tangled while she slept, and each touch of those luxurious locks made my pussy wet. I wanted to nuzzle my face into that hair and then wrap it around my wrists and make love to her. That was my secret, of course. I didn't dare tell her that I desired her sexually. It was one of my secrets. Another secret I had been keeping from her was the fact that I was slowly going blind.
When I saw that Jonah slept, I crept down the stairs to where Verandi was drinking her tea. I had decided that it was time to tell her about my failing sight. For some reason, I was nervous. Perhaps that is what secrets do to a person.
I was surprised to hear the soundtrack to The Sound of Music. Verandi was swaying and dancing to "My Favorite Things." She smiled and looked ecstatic. As soon as she saw me, she grabbed me, and we danced.
"It’s so wonderful to see you so happy," I gasped.
"I don't know what's come over me!" she laughed.
We danced and twirled through the kitchen and she spun me around like her little ballerina. I was stunned and overjoyed. The sparkle in her eyes was brilliant, and I saw the Verandi that used to live here when her husband was living. It was beautiful.
When the song stopped, I took Verandi’s face in my hands and kissed her lips deeply. It lasted for a long moment. We were both startled and our cheeks were blushing. There was an awkward pause when we separated from our kiss.
"Well…," she gulped. "I think that's enough music for tonight." She turned the vinyl player off. "I've made you a cup of tea, do you want some?"
"Sure, sure," I said and sat down across from her, drinking my tea. The usual downcast and slightly uptight look fell across on her face once again, draining away the magic of the moment before.
"I…I know what we just did must have been awkward," I whispered. "I'm very sorry."
"Oh that? It's not a problem."
"I just like seeing that side of you – happy and lively. I hate seeing you depressed and feeling insecure over everything that was taken away from you."
"Gloria…I really don't want to talk about this."
"I'm sorry," I looked down, nearly twiddling my thumbs with nervousness. "I…I'm sorry that I remind you of it…"
"You don't. It's a part of me now."
"I know how you feel, having a dark and deep past that's inside of you."
"Oh? Is there something you'd like to tell me about your past Gloria?"
"It's not really the past…it's the present."
Her jaw opened in worry. "What is it Gloria? Is it something serious?" She laid her hand on my trembling hand. I felt her warmth against my warmth.
"I…I don't know how to tell you this, but… I'm going blind Verandi."
"What?" she gasped. "Gloria, how much can you see?"
"I can't see that much anymore. Things get blurrier by the day."
She gripped my arm and I felt hand tremble.
“The worst part is that it’s hereditary. My son has the same disease, although there is a new surgery that can help him."
"Gloria, why the hell didn't you tell me this sooner? Why the hell are you even working? Don't you know how many times you've hurt yourself, how many times I had to protect you from breaking your back?!" Her voice sounded hard, distressed, and angry all at once.
"Please Verandi," I said, taking off my glasses in front of her. "Let's not panic."
"My god…it's not until now that I notice your eyes are going a little grey…”
She shook her head and wept. I went over to her and put my arms around her. It seemed that my going blind was even more distressing to her than it was to me. I kissed her cheeks and her hands and then I pressed my mouth against hers. She hesitated, keeping her mouth shut, but then she unlocked her insecurity and kissed me back. Her kiss was tentative at first. Then it turned slow and romantic. I felt her warm tongue caress my mouth. Her sensuous lips nibbled at mine. To my surprise her hand went to my hip. I caressed her back and her waist. She felt so soft and tender – I had never touched anyone who felt like she did. I quivered.
Looking into her eyes, I realized that one day soon I wouldn’t be able to see her face. I tried to get my fill, thinking of all of the things my eyes had seen: my homeland, my country, my people, my mother, my father, my sisters, my brothers, my own two feet on icy ground, the sky up high, the sunrises and sunsets, the glaciers, the volcanoes, the waterfalls, the Icelandic deserts and mountains, the oceans and continents down below when in flight on an airplane, the trees, the flowers, the man I almost married but turned down, the man who gave me my child and abandoned me, the home I shared with Verandi, and her beautiful face. And I knew that I was blessed because, even after my sight failed me, at least I could touch her, feel the lids of her eyes, the curves of her nose and her chin, the softness of her lips, the suppleness of her neck, and the erotic sensation of my crooked fingers gliding along her scalp and through her long, Rapunzel hair.
Verandi held me tighter than anybody ever had.
"I love you Gloria," she quivered. "I wish there was something I could do. You know what; I will help you pay for your son's operation and yours. I will do whatever it takes."
I breathed heavily. When I inhaled, her natural scent filled me. I'm not a Buddhist, but I felt deep enlightenment in her embrace.
I parted from her, standing up. She was still trembling and crying. I touched her hand, smiled at her, and said, "Let's go outside and ride the horses."
"No Gloria…"
"Please! Please! Pretty please!" I chanted like a little girl. “I may not be able to for very much longer.”
"Okay," she smiled, blowing her nose with a tissue. "If it will make you happy. It's quite dark outside though. I need to find the flashlights."
"Let's go outside in the dark. We don't need the light."
"Are you sure? It might not be that safe."
"Not safe? We're in the middle of nowhere! We'll be fine, I promise you."
"What about Jonah? What if he wakes up?"
"He's probably dreaming of Icelandic ponies. If he wakes up he'll see us riding the horses from outside the window and he'll think that his dream came true."
"That's sweet, Gloria."
"C'mon now, no more excuses."
I held onto her hand. We stood up together and walked outside. It was dark, really dark. I couldn't see a thing.
"Are there stars out Verandi?"
"Yes. They're bright and twinkling. You could count them if you had the patience. It's so clear and beautiful out here."
The air felt warm and lovely too, as warm as our breath. Verandi shivered.
"Are you cold?" I asked.
"No."
Verandi guided me to the barn. The horses were sweet and quiet in their spacious stalls and I pet each one on the head. I remembered the color and texture of each horse by the feel of their hair. The brown one was named Barbie, the white one was Snowflower, and the black one was Scatterheart. Barbie was sleeping; I heard her snoring.
"She's probably dreaming of Icelandic ponies too," I chuckled.
Verandi was tense and afraid. I suddenly felt as if I were her protector now. She held onto me as if she was in a lion's den.
"What's wrong, Verandi…"
"I…I don't know if I can do this Gloria."
"You know your horses. They won't hurt you. What happened to your husband was an accident. The poor creature that he rode died in the accident too. It wasn't any of their faults."
"I know," she said, shaking her head. "It's just so dark out here!"
"Don't be afraid of the dark, embrace it. It's not all that bad."
"I hate the darkness. My husband has left me in the dark. He was my lover, my husband, and my friend. I don't know if I can ever get over it."
"Hush, Verandi…"
I grabbed her and forced her against me, breast to breast. I caressed her face. My fingers glided against her skin, her eyelids, her nose, her chin, her mouth, and her neck. She quivered and trembled. It relaxed her. My eyes were wide open. In the dark, I was blind. I didn't let it bother me. I followed my own advice and embraced it.
"Now…let's get on the horses and trot around the field. We'll have fun."
She nodded, slowly releasing Snowflower and Scatterheart from their stalls. She saddled them and I waited, listening to the noise of her work. She lifted me up onto Scatterheart and held onto his reigns, leading Scatterheart and Snowflower out of the barn and into the field of long, wild, green grass and bright yellow daffodils. The warm wind blew through my hair. I felt the flowers dancing in the breeze. I smiled, thinking of how Verandi and I danced to The Sound of Music. Every bit of our surroundings was alive to me. For the first time in a long time I felt wild and free.
"Are you on the horse now?" I asked, holding onto the reigns and hearing Scatterheart's hooves lightly stomping into the dirt.
"Yes…"
"You're lying Verandi," I giggled. "Don't be afraid. Get on your horse. I dare you."
"No…"
"Rapunzel, Rapunzel, let down your hair and get on the fucking horse!"
"Don't call me Rapunzel!"
"C'mon Rapunzel, are you chicken?"
I laughed wickedly. I knew I was riling her. In an instant I heard her get up onto Sunflower's back. It sounded quick and graceful.
"My name is not Rapunzel!"
"Sure, sure, but it's about time that you got up on the horse. Ready now?" I smiled. I clicked at Scatterheart and goaded him into a gallop.
"Gloria, be careful!"
She chased after me, and then we were right beside each other, slowing to a nice trot through the field in complete darkness. The horses softly neighed and their hooves made a tiny melody in the soil. It was so relaxing. At times I turned my head at Verandi. Her spirit was at ease and relaxed. She hummed, and the sound of her voice aroused me. Her bravery and courage were turn ons. When the wind blew, I felt the tips of her hair brushing along my face and my nostrils. I wanted to burst. The feeling was so heavenly and so erotic.
"Verandi…"
"Yes, Gloria…"
"Have you ever rode a horse naked?"
"My husband and I did, sometimes, on nights like this…"
"Let's do it tonight. It's probably the only chance we’ll have, you know."
She paused. I could hear the smile in her voice: "Oh what the hell. Let's do it."
We stopped and she helped me off of my horse. I fell into her strong and comforting arms. I was in paradise. She kissed me passionately, sliding her warm and luscious tongue into my mouth. Her hands went up to my breasts; she squeezed them gently. I slid my hand down to her hip and lightly smacked her ass. She held me tightly and twirled me around. We danced. We performed the waltz. It felt like a dream. No music, no humming, just Verandi guiding me. When we stopped, we were dizzy from all the spinning. We plopped onto the ground, not too far off from the horses.
She gently pushed me into the grass and slid on top of me. She kissed me long and heavily. Her hands unbuttoned the top of my dress and then pealed it down to my waist. My breasts were bare in the cool night air, my nipples hard in the light breeze. The feel of her shirt brushing against them made me squeak.
I let out a loud groan when I felt the tip of her tongue performing the waltz on my nipples. She kissed them and sucked on them hungrily. I put my hand down to my crotch and touched myself. My three fingers pressed against my panty-covered pussy hole. I thrust my fingers upward; I was so wet and I already felt like coming. With my free hand I took off Verandi's shirt. Her breasts slapped against mine; her nipples hardened against mine. I unzipped her pants and pulled them down. We were in nothing but our underwear.
Our panties were warm and moist against each other. I jiggled and slapped her round breasts and sucked on them rough and hard into my hungry mouth. I wanted to suck on her breasts for so long – at last they were mine. I was in heaven. Her fingers found my pussy. She pulled my panties to the side and slid two fingers into me. I knew I was oozing, wet and sticky. I gasped when she pumped her fingers in and out of me in, using a smooth and gentle motion. My heartbeat fluttered with excitement. She teased and tickled my g-spot. I came three times, my hips tensed and my knees bucked. I was panting.
"Get on all fours Verandi," I said.
She obeyed. I opened her legs in that position, spread her adorable pussy lips, and slammed my tongue inside of her glorious pussy hole. She let out a tender wail. She was trembling. The inner walls of her pussy quivered. I loved the feel of her shivering on my tongue and I explored as deep as I could. As I ate out of her I pushed my thumb against her asshole. It was hot and tense. I sucked on my thumb and then slid it inside of her, pushing the entirety of my digit inside her ass.
"Oh lord!" she hollered.
"Do you like that, my Verandi?"
"Yes I do! I haven't felt this pleasure in so long!"
I crammed my tongue deeper inside of her pussy as I thrust my thumb in and out of her asshole quickly. I grasped that gorgeous hair with my other hand as if it was horse reins, and I pulled roughly on it as I fucked her with tongue and thumb. At this moment, she was mine, and I made sure she knew it. Both her holes experienced earth shattering thrills. She came in my mouth and yelped with pleasure. I slurped her juices all up, languishing in the powerful odor of her sex. It was the most amazing sensation. I couldn't see, but at least I could feel what was burning in my heart: It was love, a sacred and powerful love for my Verandi.
We collapsed the grass. I climbed on top of her; she cradled me like a baby. We were hot and sweaty. The humid air didn't help. Her hair was dirty with grass and from the sweat of my palms. I put my nose into her hair and inhaled, moaning.
"You have a hair fetish, don't you…"
"A hair fetish for yours…"
"You're quite something Gloria," she sighed happily. "You know, I feel blessed that I met you and welcomed you into my home. Even though I've lost my husband, having you here has made me feel like he's still there. You make me feel wholesome even though I don't show it. Thank you, Gloria, for bringing the old me back."
"It was here the entire time; I knew it and felt it. I even saw it. I still do."
"You might be right Gloria…"
We lay outside for at least an hour longer. It was amazing to feel her body against mine the entire time. The tingly sensation of her caressing my breasts, my thighs, my waist, my bellybutton, and my back made me feel like a sexual goddess. I loved touching her body from head to toe. It was my new wonderland.
"Do you think we'll ever do this again, Verandi?"
"Yes, on nights like this, when we feel like dancing."
"You’ll be my lover in the dark.”
I felt her smile. "We think alike."
"I love you Verandi…I love you…"
She kissed my hand. "Let's go back home now," she said. "We'll have other nights like this, I promise."
We got up slowly and went back on the horses. We trotted back home, still naked, our clothes on our laps. After we put the horses back in their stalls, we walked back into the house. We changed into our bedtime clothes. We turned all the lights off in the house, including the kitchen. Only a bit of the moonlight lit up the living room where we cuddled on the couch. I no longer felt the pain of being in the darkness; I saw the light too. It warmed my heart. Feeling Verandi beside me gave me a sense of hope. I had nothing to fear anymore. I was at one with myself and with my lover in the dark.
Originally published April, 2008